Justin Bieber stepped on Blackhawks’ logo? OK, relax
BY RICK TELANDER firstname.lastname@example.org July 10, 2013 10:14PM
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Updated: July 21, 2013 10:25PM
When Justin Bieber came to town some years back as a hairless-faced little kid with a guitar and the wee beginnings of an entertainment career, he showed a lot of talent.
He also was a jerk in progress.
At one Chicago recording house, he said he was thirsty and was brought a bottle of cold water.
He shunned it, stating that he only drank water at room temperature.
Hey, if you want to see the now-19-year-old singer’s butt crack, just look. He posted an Instagram of it not long ago.
His ridiculous former traveling monkey? It’s out there, too.
The restaurant mop bucket he peed into? Ditto.
On a tour stop in Amsterdam, at the house of famed diarist and Holocaust victim Anne Frank, this is the fellow who wrote in the guest book: ‘‘Hopefully she would have been a belieber.’’
How this shirtless Canadian nincompoop survived the wrath of California neighbor and former NFL player Keyshawn Johnson a while back, after allegedly speeding crazily in his Ferrari through their neighborhood, is clearly a function of Bieber’s many peeps guarding him rather than his almost-nonexistent physical prowess.
‘‘He has to answer to the D.A.’s office, and not me,” the irate Johnson said after going to Bieber’s house. “His handlers, his goons, whatever they are, his henchmen, they have to protect him!’’
Anyway, Bieber is a superstar singer/dancer living in a pop-rock shell, and his immaturity and arrogance are things that may or may not vanish with age.
This wouldn’t matter an iota to sports fans — though the tiny Biebs has a decent handle and crossover for a pubescent point guard, FYI —except that while in town for shows at the United Center recently, he stood on the Indian head logo in the Blackhawks’ dressing room. For no more than three seconds, I’m told.
The Indian head logo!
Holy Cheli’s Chili!
You might have thought he had just bludgeoned a baby harp seal to death with a railroad spike. (Or had his peeps do it.)
Good lord, the outcry from outraged hockey fans!
The Blackhawks just won the Stanley Cup, you know, and all of Hawky-dom is on high red alert for violations of tradition, superstition and iconography. Even Chicago folks who knew almost nothing about hockey just two months ago weighed in on social media in rage.
No matter that having some kind of quasi-sacred symbol on the floor of a sometimes tape-littered, always-stinking locker room, in a place where you are supposed to walk, borders on the definition of insanity. Bieber was vilified as locker-room visitors seldom have been.
But here’s the thing.
He didn’t know he was besmirching something ‘‘sacred.’’
He was in the locker room in the first place because he wanted to see the Cup. The Blackhawks obliged him, and according to people who were there, Bieber was excited, respectful and ready to LOL!
So horrific was the response to a photo — taken by a fan — of Bieber standing on the logo while taking photos of the Cup that the Blackhawks felt compelled to offer an explanation and apology of sorts late Wednesday.
Referring to the ‘‘Bieber Incident,’’ the explanatory statement reads in part, ‘‘As frequently happens with guests into our room, Justin inadvertently stepped on the team logo on the floor but moved off quickly once immediately reminded. He was apologetic and understanding of the tradition.’’
People who were there said Biebs was clueless about the tradition.
And why shouldn’t he be?
It’s one of those silly things that seems to exist just to make visitors feel foolish and inadequate.
Several years ago, I stepped on the Indian head one time in a jammed postgame locker room and was firmly asked to get off it by none other than Captain Serious, Jonathan Toews. I instantly did, but the look in Captain S’s eyes reminded me of a parent staring at a child while hissing, ‘‘You spit your milk one more time, buster …’’
Put the logo on the wall. Put it under glass. Put it anywhere but right where people have to walk!
The Indian head at center ice gets skated on and hocked on and carved on. Why is just the carpeted one so sacred? It gets vacuumed all the time, you know
It’s not like the goofball did his mop bucket thing on the logo.
“Chicago always does it right!’’ he tweeted Tuesday. ‘‘One of the best shows of the tour. I couldn’t stop smiling! Thank you beliebers. I love you!”
Plus — for all you little screaming girls who staked out the corners and crevices around the United Center — your guy claims to be not so different from the Blackhawks themselves.
“I’m actually part Indian,’’ he told a Rolling Stone reporter not long ago. ‘‘I think Inuit or something? I’m enough percent that in Canada I can get free gas.’’
Oh, my God, the things we worry about.
Biebs is gassed up and out of town, doing his thing in sold-out arenas.
Like baby, baby, baby, oh!