Title belts are the new sports bling

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The Packers’ Aaron Rodgers celebrates his Super Bowl victory with the Vince Lombardi Trophy in one hand and a championship belt slung over his shoulder. | Mark Humphrey~AP

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Updated: November 30, 2011 12:19AM

There’s nothing quite like it.

The feel of 20-plus pounds of leather and metal, draped over the shoulder or tightly snug around the waist.

It’s even wife-proof.

Sure, she’ll stroll into the family room, as you sit there watching television, feeling like a king in his throne. She’ll flash that look of disdain in your direction, pausing for a moment afterward to finally ask, “Why are you sitting on our couch with a championship belt on … what exactly are you the champion of?’’

Of course you have the answer. You’re the champ.

You hit the mute button on the flat screen, look her in the eyes, and calmly reply, “I’m the champ of being me.’’

Welcome to my mid-life crisis.

It’s all about “The Belt’’ these days. Or as the people at the WWE will constantly correct you on, “It’s a title. Belts are what you buy at the store to hold your pants up.’’

Semantics won’t change what’s going on in the culture of sports.

When the Dallas Mavericks shocked the Miami Heat to win the NBA Championship in June, sure the Larry O’Brien Trophy was being passed around and kissed, but it took backseat to the title belt with the Mavericks logo on it. Not only was the belt raised in the air and taking turns on the waists of players, but was carried through the crowd at the championship parade by Shawn Marion with the pride a father has carrying his first-born.

Belts are everywhere

Then there’s Green Bay quarterback Aaron Rodgers, who has done for the “Championship Belt Touchdown Celebration’’ what former Michigan great Desmond Howard did for the “Heisman Pose.’’ The gesture is simple, yet catchy. Rodgers scores? The hands drop down to his waist, and are pulled back simultaneously, gesturing to the crowd place belt here. Bears fans have seen it a few times, and might get another look at it on Sunday when the Packers travel to Soldier Field.

So when the Packers and Rodgers won Super Bowl XLV last season, what rested comfortably over the shoulder of Rodgers in almost every photo op? A championship title.

Locally, there haven’t been many championships to celebrate lately, but go watch video of the victory parade the Blackhawks put on back in 2010. Patrick Kane had a mullet on his head and a title belt hanging over his shoulder.

What used to be the trophy of choice for the world of boxing and professional wrestling is becoming as popular as the championship hats and T-shirts teams rip out of boxes to celebrate a title.

It’s all about the championship title — belt — whatever you want to call it, and every man should have one.

“Absolutely they should,’’ former WWE champion C.M. Punk agreed.

Punk would know.

The “It boy’’ of the WWE these days, Punk won the title in July, and did so in his hometown of Chicago. The victory party at the arena was one thing that night, but Punk didn’t stop there. He left the arena and took the title on his own personal victory tour around town, posing with fans in bars, as well as putting the belt in “some places I can’t even talk about.’’

Use your imagination.

The ‘over the shoulder’ look

Punk even brought the title to Wrigley Field before watching his beloved Cubs play this summer. No word on if Cubbie fans had an allergic reaction of actually being that close to a title trophy, but it was the thought that counted.

“You put it around waist or over your shoulder and it gives you an air of importance,’’ Punk described, when asked what wearing a title means. “It just makes you feel cool. In the house, on the street, the airport, yeah, wherever.’’

And even in places such as Charlotte and Winston-Salem.

Sox strength and conditioning coordinator Dale Torborg is no stranger to wearing titles. Torborg, who has wrestled in the WCW, WWE and TNT, knows the testosterone a title can bring, and annually hands out hardware to minor leaguers throughout the Sox farm system as a reward for improvements they make in their conditioning programs.

The practice is starting to catch on in corporate America.

Think about it, does Stan from accounting really need another plaque on his wall to let everyone know he’s done a great job laundering the company’s dirty money? No, Stan needs some leather and metal manhood to drape over his shoulder.

My “title’’ arrived last month. It’s been to Starbucks, on the set of NBC5’s Sports Sunday and used to taunt the rest of my NCAA ’12 Dynasty League. I’ve even named it “Belt.’’

At 43, is this just my mid-life crisis? No idea.

But it’s a hell of lot cheaper than a Porsche.