Palin's speech sends bizarre meter atwitter
Resignation remarks rival recent beauty pageant babbling
Even in the Twitter Age, there are certain time-honored rituals still observed by politicians making major announcements.
If you're running for office or celebrating a triumphant legislative victory, you hold a news conference in the middle of the week during business hours to maximize coverage.
If you're confessing an affair, admitting guilt in a scandal or resigning from office, you do that on a Friday before a holiday weekend, or a Saturday morning when national attention is turned elsewhere.
Gov. Sarah Palin announced she was resigning on a Friday before the Fourth of July. Even as she kept saying it wasn't politics as usual, that's exactly what it was, at least in terms of the timing.
As for the speech itself: WTF????
As in, Why the Fumbling?
What'd you think I meant?
Speaking in a rushed and jittery tone, barely coming up for air, Palin said that to continue to "plod along" as governor would be the "quitter's way out."
So, she's quitting because she's not a quitter. Got it.
According to Palin, since she's not going to run for re-election, it wouldn't be fair to serve out her term. But can't you BETTER serve your state if you're not worried about re-election repercussions?
"We just gotta put first things first," said Palin. "I love my job, and I love Alaska. I'm doing what's best for Alaska ... it's no more politics as usual."
Isn't that admitting you're not the right person to lead the state?
Palin also said she wouldn't go on "wasting public dollars and state time ... just so I can hold the title of governor."
With every statement, she seemed to be telling us she was really bad at her job. It was one of the most bizarre resignation speeches in the history of modern politics -- and I can't imagine how anyone in the Republican Party could witness the scene and think: There's our hope for 2012.
Here's Miss South Carolina a couple of years ago, talking about geography:
"I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because some people out there in our nation don't have maps. And I believe our education like such as in South Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, our education over there, in the U.S. should help the U.S. or should help South Africa, and should help bring the Iraq and Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future for us."
Miss California USA on gay marriage:
"Well, I think it's great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage. And you know what, in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised and that's how I think it should be between a man and a woman. Thank you very much."
And here's Palin, a former Miss Alaska contestant, explaining why she's resigning as governor:
"Basketball, and I use it because you are naive if you don't see a full-court press from the national level picking away right now. A good point guard, here's what she does. She drives through a full-court press protecting the ball, keeping her head up because she needs to keep her eye on the basket and she knows exactly when to pass the ball so the team can win and that is what I'm doing, keeping our eye on the ball. That represents sound priorities, remember they include energy and dependence on smaller government, and national security and freedom and I know when it's time to pass the ball for victory. And I've given my reasons now, very candidly and truthfully."
That's almost as weird as the e-mail she sent regarding Trig's birth. As Vanity Fair reported, Palin signed it, "Trig's creator, your Heavenly Father."
Next for Palin? She'll write her book. She can tour the country making speeches, sign with the Fox News Channel, get a radio show. Make a lot of dough.
Tucked away in Alaska, thousands of miles and a couple of time zones away from Washington, Palin would have had a hard time staying on the national radar. If she's a continual presence in the continental United States, she'll continue to receive serious mention as a candidate for 2012.
Maybe she runs for the U.S. Senate next year. In 2016, she'd be in her early 50s, and she could make a run for the presidency.
Whatever the grand plan, I can't imagine how anyone would believe that making an abrupt, rambling announcement on the eve of a national holiday is the stuff of a future legend. It just seemed inexplicable and more than a little goofy.