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Limbaugh takes on “Dark Knight Rises”

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Updated: August 20, 2012 11:50AM

This is just fantastic. Sounding like your crabby old grandpa who still thinks of Beatles as long-haired punks and has an antenna on top of the roof because TV should be free, dammit, Rush Limbaugh wonders if the villain in “The Dark Knight Rises” is another example of liberal Hollywood going after conservatives.

Let’s go to the transcript from Limbaugh’s show on Tuesday, and no, I’m not making this up:

“Have you heard this new movie, the Batman movie, what is it, the Dark Knight Lights Up or whatever the name is. That’s right, ‘Dark Knight Rises.’ Lights up, same thing. Do you know the name of the villain in this movie? Bane ... B-A-N-E.

“What is the name of the venture capital firm that Romney ran and around which there’s this make-believe controversy? Bain. The movie has been in the works for a long time. ... Do you think it’s accidental that the name of the really vicious fire-breathing, four-eyed whatever-it-is villain in this movie is named Bane?”

Accidental? No. An intentional dig at Mitt Romney’s past with Bain Capital?

Sure! That is, if you believe the conspiracy started in 1993, when DC Comics published Vengeance of Bane, which introduced the masked villain to the world.

Bane is front and center in “Dark Knight Rises,” but this isn’t even his first appearance in a film. The late wrestler Jeep Swenson played Bane in 1997’s “Batman &Robin.” The Bane character has also appeared in a number of animated and live action TV shows and videos over the years, including “Young Justice,” “Justice League: Doom” and “Batman Legends.”

Yet El Rushbo seems convinced of the Bane-Bain connection, and the possibility of brain-dead liberals being influenced into voting for Obama after they see the film.

“A lot of people are gonna see the movie, and it’s a lot of brain-dead people, entertainment, the pop-culture crowd,” said Limbaugh.

The pop-culture crowd? That’s awesome. I guess Limbaugh’s talking about all those hipsters with their Sony Walkmans and their VCRs and their MTV.

More Rush: “They’re gonna hear ‘Bane’ in the movie and they’re gonna associate ‘Bain.’ The thought is when they start paying attention to the campaign later in the year, and Obama and the Democrats keep talking about Bain, that these people will think back to the Batman movie, ‘Oh yeah, I know who that is.’ There are some people who think it’ll work.”

On Wednesday, Limbaugh did his usual spin, saying the media misinterpreted, misconstrued and misunderstood his remarks.

We didn’t.

And there you have it. The stupidest, most obtuse, most ill-conceived conspiracy theory of the year.

So far.

‘Dark Knight’ inspires lunatics

Elsewhere on the “Dark Knight” front, the popular aggregation site Rotten Tomatoes suspended user comments on reviews of “DKR” after some frothing fans got too vicious in their attacks on reviewers that dared criticize the movie.

Never mind that the movie hasn’t opened yet and most of the commenters haven’t seen it. After AP critic Christy Lemire posted a less-than-glowing review of the film, Rotten Tomatoes editors “spent several hours policing the post and removing comments with misogynistic or threatening remarks about Ms. Lemire and announced comments would be suspended,” ” according to the New York Times.

Talk about a breathtaking lack of perspective. It’s a movie about a man in a cape, people. Someone doesn’t like the movie, and you’re going to threaten her?

I’ve experience this madness firsthand when I’ve dared to give negative reviews to a certain type of film. The comments, particularly on YouTube, are hilariously over the top. They take it so personally. You’d think I had kidnapped somebody’s puppy instead of merely giving a bad review to a crappy film. Bad reviews of schlock such as “Sucker Punch” and “Green Lantern” have actually prompted fellow travelers on this sphere to wish death upon me.

To which I responded: I’ve already died slow deaths sitting through “Sucker Punch” and “Green Lantern.”

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