Lessons of Miley: Pictures provide 'teachable moment'
After being featured in a seductive pose for the May cover of Vanity Fair, Disney sensation Miley Cyrus has become embroiled in a whirlwind of negative publicity. The pictures feature the 15-year-old poptart in what appears to be topless photos taken with only a bed sheet for coverage, as she suggestively pouts for famous photographer Annie Leibovitz. Not exactly the image of a squeaky-clean Mouseketeer!
Unfortunately, Miley's parents (her father is famous country crooner, Billy Ray Cyrus) were well aware of the nature of the photographs and were even present on set for most of the day. And, while some people are pointing the finger of blame at Annie Leibovitz, and still others at Vanity Fair for printing sexy photos of a young teen, Miley's parents are the people who should have been looking out for her best interests at the end of the day.
However, as the controversy continues to rage on, it is important to remember that a 15-year-old expressing herself as a sexual person is not really breaking news -- except for the fact that the sexual person in question is a doe-eyed Disney star who has often pontificated about her vow of purity. Miley's personal past aside, let's keep in mind that humans are naturally sexual beings, and that the teenage years in particular are a time of burgeoning hormones and experimentation with sexuality and self-expression.
Although this experimentation is normal, teenagers still need parents to help guide them during this time. Teenagers develop at a faster rate physically than they do mentally, and research has shown that the frontal cortex (the part of the brain which is responsible for decision-making and judgment) is not fully developed in young teens, which makes them more likely to make rash or impulsive decisions.
Striking this balance can be especially difficult for teenaged girls, as they are receiving admiration for their appearance, but are simultaneously being told that they are not yet allowed to be sexual adults. This mixed messaging is very confusing and can result in quasi-sexual, quasi-childlike characters like Miley, the modern-day Lolita who now finds herself the sexy pop star du jour.
However, although these girls might be dressing and posing like adult women, they are still not emotionally or mentally ready to enter the world of sexuality, but they do enjoy playing at it for attention and acceptance. Unfortunately, this experimentation can lead to trouble, as predators see such sexualization as a green flag, even though it is often innocent in intent.
Regardless of whether or not these sexy photos hurt or harm Miley's career (and knowing Hollywood, they will probably help), parents can actually use this situation to their own advantage and use this story as a "teachable moment," in which they impart their own point of view and sexual mores to their children in an open and constructive conversation.
By keeping the communication lines and using situations such as these as conversation starters, parents can stay connected to their teens during this difficult time in their lives and help them make smart decisions.
See Dr. Berman at 6:45 a.m. Fridays on WMAQ-Channel 5 and listen to her at 7:30 a.m. Fridays on WBBM-FM (96.3).
