Updated: November 23, 2013 8:20PM
Dear Abby: I am attracted to a man who is 27 years my junior. He is also attracted to me because he initiated our meeting. We have gone out a few times, and he says he doesn’t care about our age difference. He has also mentioned us living together and said he would gladly pay half the expenses even though I make more than he does.
Is this appropriate in today’s society? I don’t look much older than he does. But I’m from a generation in which this kind of thing would be looked down upon. Still, I realize that the world has changed, and I feel a strong attraction to him. I would appreciate any advice you can give me. — HIS OLDER WOMAN IN MARYLAND
DEAR OLDER WOMAN: In many ways the world has changed. However, I assume that you socialize with couples and individuals in your age group, and this may cost you some of those relationships because your friends may be uncomfortable with the age difference.
I have printed letters from couples involved in successful May-December relationships in which the age made little difference. But I would suggest that you let this relationship develop a little further before deciding whether to move in together, and age has nothing to do with it.
Dear Abby: I have a good friend I have known for 15 years. We have been through a lot together and have grown through all of our changes. However, her wardrobe hasn’t changed. She still dresses like Betty White’s character in “The Golden Girls” from the 1980s.
She is in a fragile state right now because of her recent divorce. How do I tell her to lose the shoulder pads so she can meet a stud? — WARDROBE MISTRESS IN RHODE ISLAND
DEAR WARDROBE MISTRESS: While your impulse to help your friend is laudable, it would be a mistake to suggest she change her image while she is in a “fragile state.” Let some time pass, and then make a date for a day of fun, fashion, beauty and some shopping. When she’s stronger and feeling better about herself, mention that now she’s a free woman starting a new life, a new image would help with the transition.
Dear Abby: I have been with my boyfriend for nine months, and I found out that about three months ago he got nude photos from another girl. I don’t do that. I am hurt and torn on what to do. Please help. — BETRAYED IN OHIO
DEAR BETRAYED: If there are no other red flags, don’t waste your time being jealous. Take a lesson from this: The other girl gave him nude pictures of herself, but he’s still with you. If he should ask you to give him similar photos of yourself, don’t do it, because you will gain nothing and could lose a lot of privacy.
Dear Abby: At sporting events when everyone is asked to remove their hats for the national anthem, does this include females? We attend NFL games and our grandson’s soccer games, and it annoys me when I see women leave their hats on. Doesn’t “everyone” also include them? Shouldn’t they do this to show their respect for our flag and country? — STICKLER IN FLORIDA
DEAR STICKLER: Whether a woman’s hat should be removed depends on where it is being worn. In a theater or at a wedding, the hat should be removed as a courtesy if it blocks someone’s view. At a sporting event, a casual hat should be taken off when the anthem is playing. However, at more formal events, if the hat is part of the woman’s ensemble, it usually stays in place.