It’s not mom’s love life
By Abigail Van Buren June 14, 2012 8:14PM
Updated: July 16, 2012 6:35AM
Dear Abby: I need to get something off my chest. My son and his wonderful — or so I thought — girlfriend, just broke up. OK, she dumped him. Out of the blue, with no warning, she slept with another guy and the next day she told my son it was over.
I am devastated! This is a girl I loved. He hadn’t proposed yet, but my son wanted to marry her. She was going to be my daughter-in-law, the mother of my grandchildren — holidays, birthdays, weekends in the park, the beach, our house, their house, the whole nine yards.
Now I don’t know who has cried more, me or my son. I know it’s none of my business and I have to let these two kids work it out for themselves if there is anything salvageable. But Abby, I’m hurting too.
I’m so tired of people telling me I have “no right” to have an opinion about this, much less express it. I don’t want to call her yet, but maybe someday I’d like to just say I’m sorry this happened. I’m disappointed and would at least like to say goodbye.
I can’t believe I’m never going to see her again. If somehow, by the grace of God, they can put this back together, I will forever keep my mouth shut, but in the meantime, I’m just sitting here ...
A Broken-hearted Mom
Dear Mom: Clearly you are hurting, and I’m sorry for it. But young love can be unpredictable, and it’s obvious that your son’s girlfriend wasn’t ready for the kind of future you have fantasized about.
If you’re smart you will start thinking about this with your head rather than your heart.
While what happened is extremely disappointing, it could have been worse. She could have been married to your son and the mother of your grandchildren when she slept with another man and decided to bolt. Be grateful she wasn’t.
Dear Abby: I’m a contented, widowed, retired elementary school teacher. I live in the same condo complex as my fraternal twin sister and her seventh husband. She has always been a cougar — never satisfied with what she has. She’s attractive and looks 15 years younger than her age.
For almost a year she has been pen pals with a handsome man 30 years her junior. They exchange naughty nude photos and have phone sex. She likes the fantasy, but he wants it to become reality by flying across country for a long, steamy weekend. It’s inevitable that this will happen. I worry for her safety. She says she can handle it. What should I do, if anything?
Never Ceases to Amaze Me
Dear Amazed: I can understand your concern, however, your sister is well past the age of 21. From your description of her history she has been around this block many times. She knows the territory.
If I were you, I’d worry less about her safety and more about his.
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