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Little things make couple stronger

10-19-07 Dr. LaurBerman studio......Rich Hein/Sun-Times

10-19-07 Dr. Laura Berman in studio......Rich Hein/Sun-Times

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Updated: April 14, 2014 4:46PM

What resolutions did you make when clock struck midnight? If you are like most people, you probably resolved to eat healthy, exercise and save money.

However, along with those worthwhile endeavors, you also might consider making a few relationship resolutions. Here are some ways you can help to improve your relationship and your sex life in 2014:

» Resolve to share three appreciations a day. When you share an appreciation with your spouse, you let them know that they are deeply valued and that their hard work isn’t overlooked. For example, you might say something like: “I appreciate how you shoveled the driveway this morning. You really take good care of me” or “I appreciate the extra effort you have been making in the gym. You look amazing in those jeans!”

» Resolve to acquit, not convict. In fighting with their spouse, most people look for evidence to convict. In other words, they look for all the ways that their partner is wrong and all the ways their partner has let them down in the past. But what if you did just the opposite? What if you looked back at all the ways your partner has been loving and kind, at all the ways they have loved you and made you laugh? What if you gave them the benefit of the doubt and looked to acquit them, rather than convict them?

» Resolve to “Just do it.” Don’t wait until you lose 10 pounds. Don’t wait until the kids are at Grandma’s house or until the house is clean and your legs are shaved. Be spontaneous and don’t wait for perfection or an engraved invitation. Sometimes the mood doesn’t just “strike,” you have to strike up the mood!

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